I'm usually a pretty transparent person most of the time (no such thing as TMI with me), so I’d like to share my next BIG LIFE CHAPTER! Not to mention I am getting excited as the time gets closer and closer.
Around my freshmen year of high school, I started competing in pageants. I give huge credit to be involved in pageants for giving me the confidence and ability to see and love myself no matter what! I went on to do national-level pageants, a few modeling gigs, a commercial. When I was 20, I was featured in Teen People Magazine. It was an article about body image. I was also part of an Associated Press article about the same thing! I got copies of the article from places all over the world. Also, Fun Fact: No plus size clothing company had ever bought an ad in Teen People Magazine until my article was published, the very next issue had a full page Torrid Ad!
I’d say I’m just a normal small town girl. If you know me at all you know that I am fairly (to say the least) confident in my self. That hasn’t always been the case though! There was a time when I was younger (mainly middle school years) when I was made fun of regularly. I cared what people thought about me. (You know what’s funny? I look at the ones who made fun of me so many years ago and see where they are now and laugh, one word, Karma 😂) I’ve been big, fat, fluffy, chunky, plump (whatever you prefer to call it lol ) the majority of my life, but that has never stopped me from doing exactly what I’ve wanted to do!
Updated to add that I have no clue why some of the text above is so small, I have tried to fix it but it's not working lol.
Around my freshmen year of high school, I started competing in pageants. I give huge credit to be involved in pageants for giving me the confidence and ability to see and love myself no matter what! I went on to do national-level pageants, a few modeling gigs, a commercial. When I was 20, I was featured in Teen People Magazine. It was an article about body image. I was also part of an Associated Press article about the same thing! I got copies of the article from places all over the world. Also, Fun Fact: No plus size clothing company had ever bought an ad in Teen People Magazine until my article was published, the very next issue had a full page Torrid Ad!
Two years ago I made the decision to pursue weight loss surgery. I talked to my family doctor and he said he felt I was a good candidate. I scheduled the initial appointment with a doctor that was recommended to me. A few weeks after my appointment I got sick. At first, it seemed to just be a yucky stomach bug that was going around, but it never really went away. It took doctors about 4 months to discover that it was my thyroid making me so sick. In case you don’t know this already, the thyroid affects practically everything in your body. Some of the symptoms I experienced included: hair falling out, nausea, vomiting, major tremors, fatigue, headaches, weight gain, weakness in my legs, confusion, etc. This discovery put the hopes of weight loss surgery on the back burner, which I will admit was disappointing. Once I get something I want to do in my head, I tend to run with it, now I had to stop completely until I was better. I had to get healthy before they would proceed. This took some time but with the medication, I have gotten my thyroid levels back to normal and I am feeling so much better than I was, thank the lord!
Last Summer I started the process towards weight loss surgery all over again. My insurance requires a whole lot of stuff before they will approve you for surgery. I knew it was going to be a LONNNNNNNNNG process, but I also knew that in the end, It would be worth the wait. I have heard so many people call it the easy way out. I can assure you that there is absolutely NOTHING easy about this process! I have had to attend a class, have my heart checked (a stress test), have a sleep study, have an endoscopy/biopsy of my stomach, get a psychiatric evaluation (of which,yes, I passed haha 😆), see a nutritionist, attend support groups, Be seen monthly by a PA for one year for weigh-ins/checkup. Everything they have checked has come back great, except apparently, I have mild sleep apnea. I started using a CPAP machine last week. I have got to admit that Using it is not nearly as bad as I thought, but let me tell you the first thing I learned about sleeping with one of those machines.....the face recognition on my iPhone doesn’t recognize me when I wear it HaHa
I am told that, hopefully, once I have the surgery and lose weight I probably won’t need the CPAP machine anymore, so fingers crossed on that. I will admit though, I do apparently sleep much better now that I have started using it, I’m not exhausted ALL the time anymore, who knew!? I’ve noticed a huge difference in the way I sleep and the way I feel in general!
If you have never been overweight you may not understand. People look at you and automatically think you just sit around and eat cupcakes all day. Yes, my habits could use some improvement, but people are very quick to judge. Many people have said to me, “ why don’t you just exercise and diet?” Let me break this down for you..... I have been fat since ummmm, about the 5th grade, don’t you think I’ve been on about 52 diets a year since 1995? I promise you I’ve done every diet there is!
And though I know this will come as a shock to you (maybe you should sit down). I have made the conscious decision to take a break from dating (I know right!?). One of the very first things I was told when I inquired my surgeon's office about getting surgery, was that MANY relationships/marriages do not last after one has weight loss surgery. I don’t know the exact numbers but I know it’s high. I am told there are several reasons for this, including, but not limited to, your spouse is more attracted to bigger people or you gain more confidence and your partner becomes jealous. I just personally think this is a good time for me to focus on my self. I have several exciting life changes happening now that I need to focus on for the time being! I’m sure there will be others that I think of in the near future but I have already made one post-surgery rule: If you didn’t want to date me when I was big, don’t dare come to ask me out in a date now because the answer will be a big NOPE! The sad truth is that my having the surgery will probably still cost me relationships. Sometimes there are people who don't like seeing others doing good. Those people don't need to be around anyway! I have always thought that people don't or won't give me a fair chance because of my weight, but at the same time, I don't want someone who has that attitude anyway!
Other people I know that have had this surgery have all told me the same thing. If they could change one thing about it, that one thing would be “get the surgery sooner”. I know that any surgery comes with some type of risk, but I have researched this and been to many doctors along the way. I’ve also got people that have had the surgery that has offered to guide me along the way! I’m doing this for me and I am looking forward to what the future me will bring!
Until next time yall, XOXO, Brittany
P.S.- Because a few people have asked me where I am going for my surgery, I have been going to Southern Surgical in Greenville and Dr. Chapman is doing my surgery. Link to Southern Surgical listed below: https://www.southernsurgical.org/
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